Happy Mother's Day! Today has been a roller coaster of emotions! Jay and I stood in front of our church and dedicated our sweet EC! As
the staff our friends prayed for us I was in awe of this journey called motherhood. There are times I look at my girls and feel gut wrenching guilt! I never wanted kids! I was not that girl planning kids and names. Then 3 months into our marriage we were so surprised to find out we were pregnant! Now don't misunderstand me I loved my little Lindsey from day 1 but grasping all that motherhood means has taken time! I know no harder job than raising these 2 girls! They constantly challenge me and just when I think I have a grasp on things they act like little mirrors and make me take a look at myself and realize the grasp I had was not as great as I thought! I have heard story after story of how the struggle to get pregnant drew them closer to God but nothing in my life has made me seek God harder and faster than being a mom! I joke that my goal for raising my girls is keeping them out of therapy but really my goal is so much greater! I want these to girls to grow up and be women that are so passionately in love with God that they are changing the world! Sometimes the weight of that goal is overwhelming! So as a result I have to turn to God because if left up to me Therapy is the only option!
Now I can honestly tell you that my life would be so incomplete had my plans gone my way! But oh how blessed am I that God chose a different path for me! My girls are beyond sweet and amazing! When the days get mundane and I am tired of stepping in puke I must stop myself and remind myself that motherhood is a gift and I got the 2 best gifts there are! I love my sweet Linds and EC! Oh and I love that my girls have their daddy's genes! His genes are their saving grace! He is a pretty amazing guy!