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Almost Ready Blogs

Thursday, June 30, 2011

27 and grounded!

Yup, you read that right!! I am grounded by the state of Oklahoma! Apparently 7 plus speeding tickets in the past 3 years gets your license taken away! Who would of thunk! Do the cops not know that I am in my own little world doing my own little thing not meaning any harm! Guess not! For 30 days I am only allowed to drive Lindsey to school, go to the grocery store, and go to the Dr. Getting those concessions was a lot of work. I had to beg, plead, and pray to the hearing officer for just that! I decided I will blog throughout these next 27 days about my experience . . . so I hope you enjoy the reading!!!

When I first got my letter I was freaking out! What was I going to do for 30 days of NO FREEDOM!!!!! I am the type of person who has to leave the house daily! What was I going to do with a toddler 7 days a week???? I am a better mom because Lindsey goes to MDO! Once I plead my case and got my concessions I began to feel relive. As Jay and I talked about my impending grounding I began to see it as a God send! See, 2 out of the 3 days Linds is in school I keep myself busy with anything and everything. By the 3rd day I am so exhausted that I am useless. So nothing gets accomplished for me or for my family. I was giving everything I had to everyone else. The same issue I had when I was working full-time. I can tell you these past 3 days have been amazing! Tues while Linds was at school I did a little volunteer work at home and the rest of the time I did home work so my evening could be spent with my family! Wed Linds was home so I made extra sure, since we can't go anywhere, to make the day special and focus on her. I got sooooo much accomplished around my house and still managed to have quality time with her. I am realizing she needs me my full attention for 15-20 mins and then she is fine for 30-60 mins on her own. Which freed sooooo much time up. Now, I will not lie I did cheat and sneak out of the house but only to the splash park that is 1/4 mile from the house! Linds deserved the play time! Today, I was able to take a much needed nap. I woke up feeling like a truck ran me over and now when I go get Linds I can give her sooo much more of me since I have not given all of myself away!!!

I know the month is not going to be all sunshine and roses! I am going to miss my volunteer work tremendously and heck my freedom to drive where ever the frick I want but if all I do is sit back and look at the negative I have missed the bigger picture. I believe God is allowing me to take a step back before Ella-Clair gets here and get everything organized internally and externally! I hope ya'll enjoy my journey!!

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Pregnancy stuff. . .

I have some thoughtful, insightful, moving posts in my head but I can't seem to put them down yet! Sooooo how about another pregnancy post! 

Lets see I am 32 weeks along! This is one of the only belly pics I have. My sweet friend Cheryl is taking our family pics Fri and she wants to do belly pics so bad and I keep telling her no! I didn't do them with Lindsey! When it was time to do belly pics I was already preeclamptic! I had no energy for pics. This time around is a hundred times better but if I didn't do it with L I am not doing it with any of my babies! Although I do have to say that my belly is growing on me!

I have an insane craving for these cookies! I snack on the bag all day and before I know it they are gone by bedtime! What is sad is they do not sit well on my tummy so I am always sick for a couple days! O but they are soooo good. I can only get them every once in a while or I may end up revisiting my pregnancy with Lindsey!

Before Ella-Clair makes her arrival I am trying to get Lindsey in the routine of reading her Bible every morning. This is something that I have been convicted about in my life. However, Lindsey never sees me read my Bible because I try to have my time with God before she wakes up! Any who, I want her first part of the morning to be special with God and well with me too! Even when E comes I want her to always have a special time that is her's only!

I am a happy momma. . . Lindsey loves Jars of Clay. She calls it her birdie music. Since it is soooooo hot and I am carry an extra 5 zillion pounds we have a lot of dance parties to Jars. Seriously this 104 degree heat is ridiculous! I can only go to Chick-Fil-A so many times a week to play before my husband takes away my money!!!

The nesting phase has started today!! I woke up at 7 and have yet to quit going! I have a clean house, done more loads of laundry than I can count, cleaned out drawers, put up laundry, and even cleaned my laundry room. Heck I am still going during nap time! Usually right now I am curled up on the couch asleep with one eye open while Linds watches PBS! OMG what is the world coming too!

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Do Everything

Lately I have been struggling with my identity. I am no longer working and am not staying home full time. So who am I now that I no longer have a career? A few weeks ago we went to by me a car. As we were signing the loan papers the dude asked me what my career was. It was the first time I had to say stay at home mom. I almost shuddered when I said it and to make matters worse he not so kindly informed me that I would need my husband to make this purchase.
  I never thought I would be so reliant on a man! I had all these dreams of being independent and making it on my own. Now, here I am more dependent on my husband than ever. I decided after we bought my car that I had to get a grip on these thoughts or my next 5 or 6 years were going to be hell!
Here is what God is showing me! He has a divine plan for me and my little family and the path is laid out! I can not make the plans! I need to be proud of my new title "stay at home mom." God has called me and equipped me to stay home with my girls! My job is to raise them to love Jesus more than anything and to protect them! That is more important than all the butt wiping I could ever do!
God did not provide a path for me to stay home just so I could be dependent on Jay! He is my partner in this and one of my greatest supporters. He provides for us out of love and servant hood. Never has he made me feel like I do not contribute but the exact opposite he is the one reminding me that God has called us to do this and  He will provide for us in all ways!
I struggle still and will continue to struggle just because I loved my career so much but God's blessings abound from being obedient to His path. One blessing He has given me is a passion for the volunteer work I do at the church! I love so much that I get the opportunity to connect new volunteers to a place to serve God! But that is for another post! 
When Satan tries and attacks my mind I just need to remember this is the path God has called me to and there is nowhere safer than His will!